I Can't Work Under These Conditions

For the past month or so, Journal Junction has been extremely dissappointing. Most days it's lack thereof or, when there more than 3 JJ's, they're either too long or just straight up LAME. It's getting to the point that Hints from Heloise is more entertaining. What's an anonymous blogger to do?!

I just can't work with material like this:

March 1

"From Martinsburg:

 In 2008 and 2009, Social Security deducted $96.40 for my Medicare medical insurance. My deduction for 2010 is $221 per month, reducing my Medicare check by $125. So much for no tax increase for less than $250,000 a year."

Thanks for the math lesson: DON'T CARE!

March 5

"From Kearneysville:

 The Potomac Market Place shopping center in beautiful downtown Ranson needs a gas station desperately. After shopping in Weis or perhaps eating a delicious meal at Panera's, you, as the handsome, above-average individual, come out to your vehicle and begin the trip home only to find the fuel needle touching "E." In a panic, where can you go? Charles Town? You'll never make. Kearneysville? You've got to be joking."

Above-Average Individual, Under-Average Intelligence

March 8

"From Martinsburg:

 The Martinsburg Bon-Ton is giving away a free gift at the Elizabeth Arden counter when you spend $24.50 or more! It's a great value and the free gift has a lot of goodies."

Or I could just read the Bon-Ton circular that comes with the paper

March 11

"From Martinsburg:
 To the Martinsburg caller complaining about Barack Obama's budget: This is the first time the costs of the two wars have been included in the budget. The prior administration funded the two wars with appropriation bills that added to the deficit. Then there was the program to subsidize the cost of prescription drugs for the elderly that benefited the drug companies and not the people. Also, you need to consider the 2004 policy of sending jobs overseas, so unemployment is not cheap. But, hey, the Republicans have the answer: Do away with Medicare so that the retired people can add to the profit of the health care companies."

Stop being a pansy and just write a letter to the editor

March 12

"From Arden:

Here's a suggestion for the Berkeley County Sewer Department: They can follow suit with the U.S. Postal Service and only flush five days a week, or build a second floor in their main office and rent out the space."

Close to being a good one, yet somehow misses the mark
I BEG of you, Journal Readers, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE come out of hibernation and start submitting some JJ's that give me a reason to cross the road and get my paper every morning.